It’s Good To Talk – Especially If You Were Taught Not To
There’s a phrase that gets repeated so often it almost loses its weight.“It’s good to talk.”
It sounds obvious, doesn’t it?
Perhaps even a little worn.
Something you might see on a poster or hear said quickly before the conversation moves on.
But for a lot of people — especially many men — it was never obvious at all.
For some, talking wasn’t encouraged. It wasn’t modelled. Sometimes, it wasn’t even allowed.
Growing up in the 90’s and early 00’s, I remember messages like these being everywhere: Don’t complain. Don’t cry. Don’t make a fuss. Just get on with it. And often, even more bluntly: Suck it up, Buttercup!
So that’s what I did. For a long time, I kept my emotions to myself.
Writing became my outlet. A thought journal. Poetry. Quiet ways of making sense of things.
It wasn’t perfect — but it was an anchor.
Keeping things inside can be a double-edged sword.
There is a kind of strength in it. But there’s also a cost — an emotional weight that builds slowly, often unnoticed.
There’s only so much any of us can carry before we break, shut down, or need to find another way to try to move forward.
Eventually, I did. I learned to talk. Not all at once. Not easily.
At first, it felt uncomfortable. Embarrassing. Even wrong.
Then something shifted. I cried. I spoke. And gradually, I felt less alone inside my own head.
No one can ever fully understand another person. We all come from different places. We carry different experiences. We see the world through different lenses. But we can offer empathy. And we can show kindness. And sometimes, that’s enough to change things — quietly, but deeply.
It was for me. Even now, talking openly still isn’t the norm for everyone. But there are signs of change. Across generations, there’s more openness. More understanding. More space for real conversations to happen.
The most important thing I’ve learned is this: You don’t have to be alone. And you don’t have to carry everything by yourself.
Talking doesn’t have to mean sharing publicly. It doesn’t have to be neat or articulate. And it doesn’t have to happen all at once.
It might be a conversation with someone you trust. A few words written down just for you. Or even acknowledging — quietly — how you’re really feeling.
Even a single sentence can be a beginning.
This site doesn’t have a comments section by design.
Not because your thoughts don’t matter —but because some things are better held gently, not performed.
If this stirred something in you, take it with you.
Let it sit.
Let it surface in its own time.
And remember —it is good to talk. In whatever way feels safe, honest, and right for you.